It's like a time machine, but for reality.

I have not been myself. I have been living in this alternate reality for the past two weeks. Time doesn't really exist for me right now except that I know it is not April anymore. Not sure when resurfacing will happen, but I wanted to let all those out there who have noticed that I was missing that I am not dead and I will be back. In the meantime, a pic of socks halfway through the process.

I'm not sure if the pic is added or not. If not, I don't know how to di it right now, and you can find the pics over at ravelry :) If it worked I hope there are not three of the same pics.

Mean Kitty

This seems to be going around ravelry, but oh how it made me smile. Enjoy!

As for knitting, this weekend started early for me. I left work around 2:30 on Thursday and didn't have to go back until today. Why you ask? Extra vacation days? The niceness of my boss? No, I'll tell you why. The dread stomach flu. Needless to say, little knitting got done for the first two days. A lot of sleeping, basically no eating, and no knitting at all.

Marshmallow madness

Do yourself a favor. Watch it twice. I was crying during the second viewing.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YOfZPZJHnKg

A girl's gotta have some socks...

Whether that girl be human or canine.

My lovely Hederas in C*EYE*BER Fiber, Electric Plum.



Cookie A's Twisted flower in Louet Gems, Eggplant.


Ribbed wonders in Berroco Sox, 1477 (the blueish-green one).





And the too-big-soon-to-be-frogged Monkees in Colinette Jitterbug, Dusk (77).

Which is your fav?

The good, the bad and the ugly

A.K.A. clue #2, I hate you.

So, I've been doing this Secret of the Stole ii. It's a cool little online thingy in which each week a new part of the chart of DK, the nautical knitter's, new pattern is released. I have been holding on to this beautiful South American alpaca I was given and thought this would be a great time to use it. I was mistaken. I 'm not sure there will ever be a good time for this yarn. Which brings us to the ugly... I'm gonna do it all backwards so I leave you with the good.

The Ugly:

Can you see all the ends? It's hard, I know. Since it's so hard for you to count them, let me do it for you. 1... 2.... 3.... 4.... 5...... 6.....?!? Really? 6 joins in the first 100 rows? Are you kidding?!?!?
No. I am not kidding. I had 6 knots to untie and join back together at this point in my knitting. I was still using my first skein, only 50 grams in.


Who's ready for The Bad?

The bad is that at some point, one of those joins turned my stole into this. Stripes. Not so much the look I was going for.


And now, The Good;
Isn't she lovely? Isn't she beautiful? Yup. This baby is made out of a whole new yarn. I broke down and decided I just could not go on with the other yarn of horrors. Coincidently, I made this decision just in time for the Super Bowl Sale at my LYS and I got to bring home two lovely skeins of Jade Sapphire Lacey Lamb. Seriously I had rubbed this yarn on my face every week. It basically already belonged to me if you counted the number of my epithelial cells mixed in with the luscious superwash wool. And at the start of week 5 of the SoTS ii I have just finished clue #2, again. Does that count as doing 4 clues?

Bonus pic (cuz you guys are so great):

These are the six tiny cakes (shall we call them cupcakes?) of yarn that made up clues #1 and #2 of SoTS ii version 1.0. I'm just sayin' right now that if something happens to version 2.0 there will NOT be a 3.0.

I just read 257 comments.

Usually I'm not so much of a comment reader, at least not on other people's blog.
Mostly they are stupid people with little to do besides berate other people's opinions. I read the comments on this post, though, because they were making me laugh. The comments were making me laugh. After about 150 I should have stopped. Now they are just making my head hurt. And I do agree, Spencer is a douche and I hurt for Heidi that she can't see the devil horns hiding in his perfectly-groomed-yet-evil hair.
There is knitting going on, I promise. Later all will be revealed. (I haven't uploaded pictures to my 'puter yet)

Vacillation in knitting land

As a knitter I'm usually very focused. I find a project I want to do, go out and find yarn just for that project, promptly sit down and knit, knit, knit until I am done with said project. My mind never wanders to other projects that might be looming or that have been sitting hidden in the closet.
The problem with hanging out with a group of excellent accomplished knitters (Karen, Kristen and Gena) is seeing all the wonderful options out there. My blinders get yanked off with a vengeance.
For the first time ever I have at least 4 projects that I am working on. These babies are not just sitting on needles, they are in my bag (actually, I am up to two bags). I carry them with me everywhere. Let's not even get into the fact that I am also carrying 3 kinds of roving, a book on spinning, and a 1.8oz top whirl spindle.
So what are these amazing projects I can't leave behind as I trudge back and forth to work, the store, the park, everywhere(!) ?

1) My lace project. I am working on the Icarus scarf from Interweave Knits Summer '06. (Thank you Kristen, for a lot of things :) ). This project is the first to be cast on from yarn acquired at SAFF, an amazing and wonderfully welcoming fiber and animal fest in Asheville, NC. The girls and I went a couple weekends ago. This amazing yarn is a lovely sage color handpainted by The Sanguine Gryphon. It has been lovely to work with so far. Pics coming soon.

2) My cable project. The twisted flower socks by Cookie A. Lovely yarn, complicated pattern, size 1.5 needles. These needles have been silent for weeks. (Why am I still carrying these? Because I will finish these, oh yes I WILL finish these socks.)





3) My alpaca project. Oh the wonders of alpaca. Remind me to tell you about the wonders of making alpaca yarn. It's an adorable bag. I've made this bag before in a bigger size, same yarn different colorway.





4) My practical project. I am making Knucks in the amazing Iris colorway from Miss Bab's. I'm not sure that I will embroider anything on these. The colors of the yarn and gorgeous and need no further adornment. Pics also coming soon.

I'm also carrying in my bag(s) a 7 ft finished scarf out of organic cotton. I'm not sure why I still have this with me. Partly I think I'm just trying not to loss is before I give it away for X-mas. I loss stuff... a lot. Like the feeling in my left arm as I lug all of this around.

Infrequent at best

I have a declaration to make. I am horrible at blogging. However, I have felt the tug of blogger bringing me back once again to try and make some sense of my world through this public forum. I think that I might feel like I have more to share this time around. I am joining the world of knitting bloggers. The beauty of this? Knitting bloggers love reading other people's knitting blogs. It's like this little bubble world where people can never get enough of yarn and needles and the goodness that is Interweave Knits. I have knitting girls now. They all have blogs. In order keep from feeling out of the loop, I shall give this another go. I have to say though, it probably will be infrequent at best.

Gasp, another post....

Don't worry... no pointless drivel about things which mean very little to those other than me. Today I thought I would chat about something which could make anyone's day full of roses, sunshine and some annoying Disney-like forest music. Today I want to talk about Converse. Now, I love my Chuck Taylors. I can't get enough of them. Basically since I was old enough to pick out my own shoes I have bypassed the trendy heels and dangerous looking wedges other were wearing, and picked myself up a pair of reliable, good-for-everything chucks. I have to confess, they weren't always real chucks. More than once I found a great pair of converse knock-offs at Payless and gladly paid my $9.99 for 3 or 4 months of wear. Mostly I couldn't resist because they were made out of some fantastic fabric with ladybugs or some other nonsense. Either way, real or not, I have worn every pair until the hole in the bottom of the sole starts letting in little rocks (or snow) and then, they get to live in my closet for a long time before I can part with them.
Did I just get a new pair? Is that what this is all about? No, even better. I was perusing the little knitting booklets... you know the ones the cover one wall by the yarn in the craft store? I was looking for some variation on a style of baby sweater I am hoping to knit for an ex-boyfriend who just had his first baby. (A girl! Welcome to the world little Niev.) In amongst all the horrible, terrible, no good, very bad bootie patterns I discovered (pause for effect) a pattern for baby high-top Chuck Taylor All-Stars. Oh my. The world is right again. Can't you see the sunshine breaking through the clouds? What is that annoying sound I hear? Disney forest music?
I am almost done with the first shoe. I am making some modifications as I want it be a little girly, but I could not think of a more perfect bootie for my artist friend's first daughter. (or anyone frankly... if I have some time I am going to try to make slippers for myself on much bigger needles with bigger yarn.)
Happy Wednesday folks. Hope there's a smile on your face too.

ok... I have to update. I just went to the site to get the link info and all, and I discovered that Converse has a design your own All-Stars feature. How cool is that.

paralyzed

I spend like 90% of my life in a state of paralysis. I look around and see all these wonderful things creative people are making and I think "That's just gorgeous" and this melancholy comes over me. This sense of longing and loving all packing into a second. See, I could be one of those creative people. I am a creative person when I allow myself to be. The problem is I can't feel without consequences. My greatest defense against being swallowed in fear and sadness is often to not open my mind to anything. I find myself stopping any sort of mental conversation which will lead me to thinking about pretty much anything emotional. Most people can't or won't understand this. They want to know why I don't sell the things I make. Why I don't go back to school. Why I don't get a better job or look at the life I am living and make choices. "I can't" never seems to be a good enough answer for them.

A new image for a new year

Every nine months or so I decide I can no longer stand my hair and need to get it chopped off. Once this ended with very short hair and two thirteen inch braids on their way to Locks of Love. I left the salon feeling great about someone else getting a chance to have hair and not so great about the way my hair looked. I never like my hair after it gets cut. I'm thinking this is why I never get it cut more than twicea year. This christmas, I was hating my hair again and instead of looking for someone local (I never go back to the same person) I got my hair cut in California. by my mother's stylist. It doesn't suck. It's also not what I asked for, but all the same. I am back to hair above my shoulders

Real Men

Ok, I know. It's been a long time. I could throw out the excuses and all, but really, besides the wedding on the other side of the country and all the knitting for that and christmas I got nothing. The knitters out there know what i mean.
So, my post today is about "real men". I could go on and on about how real men are supportive and everything, but I think instead you should just watch this.

I'm going home for christmas a week early this year. You'd think I would have some knitting or some shopping done however, being me this is what I have done:
Most of one sock (have I told you yet that I have never finished both socks for a pair)
Most of one hat.
Slightly more than half of this. If I get really ambitious, I might make matching wristers.

My flight is a week from Saturday. I have pretty much no shopping done. Holly Gololly to you.

Spinning Roving Swap package

I had such fun taking part in the spinning roving swap. I spent months looking forward to recieving my box, but what turned out to be the best part was sending all the goodies I found out to my partner. It gave me an excuse to get a little crafty crazy. I was so hoping that Julie would love it and she did! She posted about it here and put up some great pics of what I sent here. When I read her post (I read her blog regularly) it almost made me cry. She was so appreciative and I feel like she really loved the stuff I sent which was my ultimate goal. Lots of times I handmake things for people and they don't really understand what time went into the process. It's nice to be appreciated.
It's been about forever since I sat down and just decorated stuff. The last time was my freshman year in college and I decorated an empty bottle of Malibu rum with pictures ripped out of a magazine and clear nail polish. Got a bit of a high that night. I also painted a craft box with nail polish that year now that I think about it. I had a touch of insomnia that year and started getting creative with my time. Maybe I should have studied more... hmm.
Anyways, Thanks Julie for the kind words, and oh! I should talk about what I got too. My other swap partner was Paula who went under the assumed name of Bruce Sparrow, not relation to Jack. She sent me a lovely Bosworth spindle and some very lovely Burgandy/bluish roving. I also got some of the softest white roving I have every felt. Her pics turned out much better thanmine, so here they are. It is all very wonderful and waiting for me to learn how to spin. Thanks to all again.

No longer a sad llama

Since I changed the name of my blog (again) I figure today might be a good day to talk about my fear of names. Names are powerful things. Much more powerful than most people believe. I used to be a Mindy. No, I was not a cheerleader. I wasn't even perky, but Melinda seemed so grown up and Mel just reminded me of old men.
I hate naming things. Animals, blogs, companies, stories. I jsut can't ever seem to get it right. I am always thinking about what conclusions people are making about me, my fiber, my fabric creations. So, I have changed my blog, or published new ones like four times. Don't be surprised if the name keeps changing with my moods. Since I am feeling very productive right now and I have lots of things I am looking forward to this llama is not currently that sad.

It's October? Already?

I feel so very behind this year. I am usually so on top of things for Halloween. I have ideas about the house, ideas about my costume (all I really do is answer the door for the 25 kids that live in the neighborhood), ideas for the dog's costumes, the kid's costumes are made and ready to go and this year, nothing. nada. nyet.
The kid's have store-bought costumes (gasp!!). My house is decorated by one cow-bell lawn stake. I don't even have pumpkins to carve yet, and I imagine I will be wearing what I did last year if I bother to dress up at all.
I have to say, for someone who LOVES Halloween, this is very out of character. I just feel slow and lazy this year, and overwhelmed by things. I'm afraid the old depression is kicking up again.
I keep thinking about all the things I have to do and how they are all pilling up and I am letting things slide all over the place. Missing deadlines, just not doing stuff, not really caring that much when I do disappoint.
For anyone who has faced depression and come out the other side there is nothing scarier than facing it all again. Especially for someone like me who has successfully been off drugs for years. Someone who doesn't even have a doctor in this state. Someone who has a habit of hiding when they are sick so as not to disappoint people who love her. It is a difficult and precarious situation to be in.

Randomness

48 Things You Could Care Less About

1. FIRST NAME? Melinda

2. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Nope. My mom just thought it was pretty. As far as I know...

3. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY? I cry all the time. Yesterday a newsletter came home from preschool with the kids. It was about a little girl who went to school with them last year. Her 2 1/2 year old sister has stage 4 cancer. Anyone who didn't cry should be checked out to see if they are human.

4. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Yeah. I really do. My mom the teacher says I make my letters funny, but my writing has evolved over many years of trying new things and keeping what I liked

5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCHMEAT? I don't really like sandwiches, but if I have to it would always be first, turkey or then, ham.

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? I would think I was pretty cool, but that I don't keep in touch that well.

7. DO YOU HAVE A JOURNAL? I have tried more than once... I just don't keep up with it.

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yup.

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Given the right circumstances

10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? I love Lucky Charms, but every morning I eat some flakey thing with clusters.

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? No - I just kick them off and have to untie them to put them back on.

12. DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? I always wanted to be a really tough girl, but mostly I just act tough. I believe there is a lot of learned inner strength however.

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR? I just like ice cream. Pretty much any flavor, but I love it when there are things inside. I guess my very favorite would be double chocolate malted crunch. Can't get it in NC, but I grew up with it in Cali at the Thrifty's stores.

14. SHOE SIZE? Anywhere between 61/2 and 8 depending on shoe. Mostly a 7 though

5. RED OR PINK? I like bolder colors. I would have to choose red

16. WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? I look to other people to make judgements about myself much to often

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? I have two best friends I rarely ever talk to. Both were the most important people to me at one point in my life, and I wish I was better at long distance communication so I could better keep up with them.

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO SEND THIS BACK TO YOU? These are popping up all over the place. Every blog I read has one up.

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS, SHIRT AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Blue jeans, green shirt, white socks, no shoes, tye dyed hands from kool-aid dying the roving I am sending for the roving spinning swap.

20. LAST THING YOU ATE? Just finished some Mellow Mushroom Kosmic Karma pizza leftover from last night. Yum. Happy belly.

21. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? The nascar race on the TV in the other room.

22. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? I would be forest green.

23. FAVORITE SMELL? I love the smell of cinnamon, but there are lots of smells which have great associations to me.

24. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? Probobly my boyfriend, but I live with him so it doesn't count. THe last important person I talked to was my Mom. We talked for a couple hours which was nice as it doesn't happen that often.

25. THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO? Probobly hair. It's been a while since I've really looked. I can't be with a guy if he can't make me laugh.

26. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON you stole THIS from? Yeah. I don't actually know here, but I read her blog January one all the time. It's the top of my bookmark blogs.

27. FAVORITE DRINK? I love hot cocoa and Wassail punch

28. FAVORITE SPORT? I love watching football. RIght now the Steelers/Falcons game is on. Oops just flipped to the Panthers /Bengals.

29. EYE COLOR? THey change colors with what I am wearing. Yoday they are very green. (See #19). They also get very blue. Mostly they are just greyish.

30. HAT SIZE? Small. I have a pretty small head.

31. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Nope. Used to wear glasses but they got smashed while wrestling with the puppies. Now I jsut don't wear anything. My eyesight is pretty good.

32. FAVORITE FOOD? Anything sweet.

33. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Both. I like getting freaked out, but it just seems so right when all the ends tie up into a nice happy package. As long as there is an actually ending I leave satisfied.

35. SUMMER OR WINTER? Fall, but I would take a NC winter over a NC summer anyday. Growing up in Southern California means I didn't really have any seasons, so I really enjoy the changes every few months.

36. HUGS OR KISSES? Hugs

37. FAVORITE DESSERT? Either some kind of creamy chocolate thing or Creme Brulee flavored or vanilla.

38. WHO IS MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND?

39. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND?

40. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING? Spinning in the old way and whatever I picked up at the library. I don't have a lot of browsing time because I go with the kids.

41. WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE Pad? I use a laptop.

42. WHAT DID YOU WATCH LAST NIGHT ON TV? Went to a movie last night. Saw the cute Leonardo DiCaprio and Matt Damon with lovely boston/irish accents in The Departed.

43. FAVORITE SOUNDS? I love windchimes. Not the high pitched ones, the long deep mournful ones.

44. ROLLING STONE OR BEATLES? Um. I'm a little young for either of these. I do actually have a beatles CD though, so...

45. THE FURTHEST YOU'VE BEEN FROM HOME? Paris France, but every day I'm about 3,000 miles from home.

46. WHAT'S YOUR SPECIAL TALENT? hm. I'll have to think about this one. I don't really have any parlor tricks.

47. WHERE WERE YOU BORN?In Panarama City, California.

48. WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Stole it from January. (See #26).

The LIST

The more I think about the list the scarier it seems. How many days until Thanksgiving?
Let's start with October. It's always a busy month with 2 kids and 2 dogs needing costumes every year, not to mention throwing something together for myself (all for the joy of dressing up as we will maybe, if we are lucky, get 25 kids at our house).So....

1) Costume for Sarah. She's 2 and going to be a princess. This one will be very fun, and probably not pink at all. Due date: 10/29 for school party

2) Costume for Aaron. Probably a prince. He's told me he wants to be a prince so he and Sarah can get married. Hm. They are siblings, but technically they would be royalty and marrying within the family not so strange with royals. Due date: 10/29

3) Dooblebop costume for Morgan. This one is a favor for the kid's Nana. It should be easy, and is almost halfway done already. Due date: 10/20

4) Butterfly quilt. Also for Nana. This one is in process, and the most frustrating so far. It for some reason was harder to picture than others I've made, and therefore I procrastinated. A lot. Due date: Next Monday

5)Socktober!!! I have only once ever made a sock. It was about 2 weeks ago, and I am really hoping to get at least the mate done this month, and I have declared this year x-mas of the socks. Everyone I know should expect socks. If I have time that is... so don't spread the word yet. Due date: October I guess, and then 12/20 or so. As long as they are done before I get off the plane I am good.

6)At least one hot dog costume for a dog. Mr Grumpy, the live-in boyfriend saw the pattern and asked for one for his boss. Also, our friend has a little yippy dog and I have threatened to dress it up this year.

7) Spinning roving swap package. I owe a cool spinning beginner set to my swap partner. Neither of us know anything about spinning. This scares me. More on this soon because I have plans for it...

I guess that's enough to start with. Expect LIST: part deux in the near future. I will also try to put up some pics of my projects, knitting and sewing.

Deficiencies

Everyone has things they aren't good at.
I have decided that I am not good at blogging. Not so much the writing part, although that remains to be seen. More so the set-up part.
I think most people out there (in cyber world) have been pre-wired to set up a blog. They pick a cute template, add charming buttons and pics to the sidebar, have endlessly creative names and thoughts peeking out at you.
I on the other hand have not figured any of this out. It might sound somewhat uncharitable of me, but I don't understand how all these middle aged ladies have great sites, and I can't figure out how to customize any part of my template.

I am working on it. I have a few "peeps" I can talk to for some advice.

The next 2 months are going to be crazy for me. I have about 15 things (no exaggeration) that need to be done by Thanksgiving, and that's ignoring promises I made last Christmas. I'm not sure how I'll be able to get everything done. After I finish these things, x-mas will be flying right at me, and since I always fly home, planning must be done in advance. Projects finished before I get off the plane, gifts picked, sent, or bought by elves back home. I suppose a huge part of this is my procrastination. Always have I waited until the last minute. With school work, one might understand, but I do it with everything. I like sewing. I like knitting. I like crafting. I love picking things out for people. I never do any of these with time to spare.
Oh well, my stress is my own.
More later about the UFO's and other projects coming up. Maybe a whole list.

Night, the first

I always seem to have so much more to say at night. Many nights I lay in bed with 15,000 things running through my head . I am hoping that if I just write those doubts, ideas, nonsensical plan out in some context I will be able to see things, maybe even myself, more clearly. If nothing else, maybe I will be able to slow my brain down enough to get some sleep. For an insomniac girl like me, being at work at 8 am is sometimes just torture.